questionable....

dreams... aren't they supposed to be an outworking of our deeper thoughts and fears? processing life?

i guess i'm dreading going back to school more than i want to admit.

dream: i'm back in an undergraduate program, it's exam week, and i'm trying to frantically pack and get ready to move back home.... in the meantime, i'm ignoring 5 exams (math, english, spanish, economics, and some other class). it's a thursday night and exams are all due on friday... to my dismay, i realize that i'm starting a little late (DUH!!) on massive writing assignments, tests, readings, etc. i prepare myself for an all-nighter... sitting down at the computer and staring at a blank screen is kind of scary, so i start soliciting help.... i ask my mom to pre-read something, rodrigo to give me the imperfect tense of a spanish report, economics is left on the side, i start tackling a nine page paper, reasoning all the while that my professors are reasonable people and that i can turn my work in after the weekend.... the worst part of the dream wasn't that they weren't available to help me, but that i kept thinking that people would know that i couldn't have possibly finished the work on my own by friday.... a dream about procrastination, doing the right thing, being accountable for my own work....

in the meantime, now that i have woken up, i do realize that i'm trying to pack, i've neglected my grad school readings.... and several other things.... sigh.... if that isn't a sign to get going....

alright.... so, sunday morning i start my two day drive to vermont... please keep me in your prayers. i'll try to be not so blog-silent .....